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Mark Twain states the theme: "No real estate is permanently valuable but the grave." Newlyweds (James Brolin, Margot Kidder) inspect their new home, shock cuts to the execution-style familial slaughter that took place a year earlier set up the sales agent’s punchline ("It’s all included in the price"). The demonic spirits in the property resent the invasion, a swarm of vilely buzzing flies is unleashed onto Rod Steiger’s vein-bulging padre. Rocking chairs rock by themselves, cats hiss by the window, black goo bubbles up from the toilet. Dad morphs into a grouchy lumberjack -- he stares with red-rimmed eyes at logs crackling in the fireplace while Mom tries to piece together the mysteriously smashed Virgin Mary statuette. "Based on a true story"? Other gags in Stuart Rosenberg’s horror version of Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House include eyeballs glowing in the dark (Lalo Schifrin quotes Psycho’s shrieking violins, what the hell), Murray Hamilton reprising his Jaws character with a clerical collar, and Helen Shaver’s rendition of a hippie wife moved to pickaxe-wielding paranormal glee ("Boy, are these vibes ever so strong"). The introductory vision of the house as a square demon-head with gleaming window-peepers is from Tati’s Mon Oncle, what follows is an astonishing number of fumbled frissons. Unless... The loose staircase ornament? The brother-in-law’s misplaced cash? The little daughter’s imaginary friend? Brolin’s cuffing at the bar counter? If you want a lyrical-gruesome yarn about possessed realty, go ask Lucio Fulci. For an abstruse burlesque of It’s a Wonderful Life, look no further. With Don Stroud, John Larch, Michael Sacks, Amy Wright, Val Avery, and Irene Dailey.
--- Fernando F. Croce |